Goodbye Elliot

It was with a heavy heart that I read this tweet from the V&A Waterfront account, yesterday.

Yes, after three years valiant service to the Waterfront and its visitors, Elliot, the iconic Coca Cola “crateman” is to be dismantled.

I’m taking the kids along to see Eliot for one last time this afternoon. Doubtless, there will be tears: he’s been a big part of their lives, with every visit to the Waterfront necessitating a trip to his feet. (And occasionally slightly higher when Dad wasn’t looking.)
Rarely have I been moved so much by a piece of art.

   
Note those tiny kids at his right foot, 10 August 2010.

Previously, Elliot has also featured on this blog, when an angry man described him as:

a monument to mediocrity, global exploitation and humankind’s dysfunctional health and disregard for our treasured eco-heritage.

and I defended the sculpture, using the tools of rationality, accuracy and ridicule.

Those were the days.

But now, it’s Elliot’s time to move on to a better place.
Although, looking at that second photo, is there really a better place?

Goodbye Elliot. Hamba Kahle, old friend.
And thank you for all the joy you’ve brought my kids and me.

Cover of a remix of a tune

Mrs 6000 has been looking forward to seeing ISO (you may remember them from posts such as Destiny) at the Waterfront ever since she heard that they were going to be playing there this evening. Then I smashed my ankle into more pieces than should rightfully be in there and it suddenly seemed a bit of an ask to get there.

But I was adamant that she must go anyway and she got some unsurprising buy-in from the kids. I was good, stayed at home and RICEd, but since I’d planned to share this video tonight anyway, here it is:

Are you actually allowed to do a cover of a remix? Are you allowed to do dubstep on electric guitars?
ISO says yes, and I love it.

And the concert was apparently also great, with Richard from the band working on their future fan base after the gig:

image
Scoop got their autographs and there’s even video of her rocking along to the track above, headbanging and all.
Scoop is 4. Dad is so very proud.

What a find…

I was just wandering around Pick n Pay in the Waterfront this morning, looking for rice snacks for the kids’ lunchboxes as it happens, when suddenly my gaze was caught by a flash of familiar orange.

Yes. Convivial Yorkshire Crisps with a guest appearance by my favourite condiment. There’s even a photo on the back of the tub of that factory next door to the hospital where I was born:

The hospital which has since been demolished. Yes, I know.

And within that beautifully decorated tub? Heaven in fried potato form.

So who am I to ignore the request to be convivial?
I shall eat, drink and be merry. And then I’ll go and buy some more and do it all over again.

Stress Free Christmas Shopping

After all these years, I think I’ve found the way to do it. And while it might ruin the chances of a repeat performance for me next year, I’m willing to share my new found knowledge with you, my loyal reader.

You’ll need a few things to make this work well:

Firstly, you need to not be at work. Obviously, you need to have a job in order to have money to pay for things, but you don’t want to be at work on this particular day. That said, you do need it to be a normal working day for everyone else. I used Monday 20th December.
Secondly, you don’t want to have any children with you. For this purpose, we used Poliswa. Trained in the art of looking after our kids, she did an admirable job of doing just that all day (plus all the washing, ironing, cleaning etc etc etc). The woman is a dynamo.
Thirdly, pick your venue carefully. It must have all the shops you need, but as few as possible of the ones that other people need. This rules Anal Walk out completely, because while it has three shops that you need, it also has 7,613 of the ones that you don’t. This 0.394% useful shop ratio (USR) is completely rubbish. Cavendish is full of Southern Suburbs tannies (even more so than usual) which is extremely unpleasant and you need to remortgage your house to afford parking there.

You should probably head for a smaller mall, like the V&A Waterfront, which Capetonians avoid throughout December because they think it’s going to be hugely busy with tourists, but which in actual fact is ever so quiet: all the Vaalies are doing the boat trips because they’ve never seen the sea before, and all the Europeans are stuck in a snowdrift in Heathrow, Amsterdam or Frankfurt.
The V&A also has Meloncino, which is a great place to stop for lunch and an even greater place to stop between 4-6pm, when all cocktails are half-price. The service is excellent, the food is excellent and the views are none too poor:

Panorama via Photaf for Android

And then just go for it, safe in the knowledge that there will always be a draught Peroni or Strawberry Daiquiri waiting for you should you need a break. Or – if you need sustenance on the fly – a small Lindt chocolate reindeer.

We left home at 8am and returned at 6pm. Parking was R10, all our was shopping done and surprisingly we were still talking to one another and actually rather relaxed (if a little jaded). Neither of us is quite sure how or what happened, but we will be trying it again next year.

I might actually test drive the beer and cocktail bit each month. Just to get it exactly right.
Planning is everything.