We can fix our s#*t

2017 has been yet another rough year for everyone, everywhere across the globe. I guess then that the only individuals who are even vaguely happy are the astronauts on the International Space Station, but even they have to come back down to earth (figuratively and literally) at some point.

But I’d wager that the people of South Africa have had it worse than most, on average. On top of all of our usual daily problems of unemployment, poverty, crime and getting distracted by the outstanding scenery, we have descended deeper into so-called State Capture, and with it, many the associated depressing economic consequences, which in turn have exacerbated the unemployment, poverty and crime.

It can like to be a vicious circle of note.

Things may seem bad right now, and that’s precisely because things are bad right now. But South Africa has a history of bouncing back from these sort of seemingly impossible-to-bounce-back-from situations. Hence this sort of positivity from this brilliant Nando’s advert.

There’s a lot in there that South Africans will understand. But it will leave a lot of 6000 miles… readers overseas a little bewildered. So, why am I posting it, knowing that half the people who see it will already have seen it and it will mean nothing to the others?

Well, because I like it and I know that in n years time, someone – probably in a pub somewhere in Bloemfontein – will go:

Hey – remember that Nando’s advert? The one just before JZ got dumped as President? That was so funny.

…will google “Nando’s State Capture Advert” and will arrive here and enjoy the above once again. For old times sake.

If that’s you: Hi. We’ve been waiting. Amazing how prophetic the advert was, hey? We really did manage to fix out s#*t once again.

I know. I’m also amazed.

Dubai

I’m flying to Dubai today, and that’s got me quite excited.

Travelling is exciting anyway, but Dubai is especially thrilling.

Reason: Loads of ANC-related people seem to have gone to Dubai in the past, and returned with lavish gifts, bonuses, jobs and property. (Not literally property, obviously, but the legal documentation thereof.)

Now, I’m not an ANC-related person, but I really don’t see how this will adversely affect my chances of hitting the big time in the commercial hub of the Middle East. It seems to me that all I have to do is attend a meeting that I will thereafter swear never took place, say yes to the right people, and suddenly Atul and Ajay are my metaphorical uncles.

Ker – if you’ll bear with me for one more moment – Ching.

I can’t wait. I might even take a R600m bribe if when I’m offered it.
Well, it’d be rude and wholly ethical not to, wouldn’t it?

And I’d hate to be rude.

I’ll be back presently, and in the meantime, blog posts will obviously continue, as they always do. Once I’m completely captured, I’ll be able to travel a lot more to Dubai, launching 6000.ae before potentially retiring there and avoiding numerous criminal charges.
Impunity and immunity can like to be my middle names.

I mean, have you seen their extradition policy with SA?
No? Exactly.

Information is king

Cash used to be king, then thanks to Bill Gates, content was king for a while, but we’re now in the information age and information is now king having deposed the other two in a bloodless coup.

And I, for one, welcome our new factual overlord.

Further evidence of this monarchical shift is the daily stats on 6000 miles…, your favourite go to blog for all things… well… for all things. We can like to do eclectic.

Here’s a prime example – which were the pages that people looked at most on here yesterday?

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The big news in SA yesterday was the State Capture Report. Everyone wanted to read the 355 pages for themselves, seeking possible confirmation that our President had been acting improperly, unethically, in a corrupt manner, and generally taking the country for a ride for the benefit of himself and a few of his cronies. (Confirmation was duly provided.)
The website of the office of the Public Protector was overloaded, so I helped out by uploading a PDF of the report on here. And lots of people viewed that post. I would count this is an information post.

In second place yesterday was people accessing the front page of the blog. Simply typing “www.6000.co.za” into their URL bar and looking at what was on offer there. It’s loads. Loads.

Third place goes to the SARS minus number post. Also helpful information. SARS is our taxation service, and once you’ve submitted your tax return, they drop you an email with a number in the OWED TO YOU box at the bottom. Often this number has a minus sign in front of it. But who owes whom in that case? People are confused and thus that post, which explains all, is regularly up in the daily top 3.

Fourth, more reference material. For the morning and evening rush hours, the barriers at Kenilworth station in Cape Town remain closed for a prolonged period of time. But what are those times? I posted them, and people regularly click through to find out.

Fifth “Stop Zuma“, probably related to the State Capture thing and this tweet, bizarrely suggesting that the DA’s election campaign from 7½ years ago could now be considered a raging success (if you conveniently ignore its repeated failures and the unfolding national disaster in the intervening period). (And the fact that Zuma has actually not been stopped.) (But otherwise, sure.)

More informative posts at sixth and seventh. Helpfully sharing which towns the two or three letter codes on Western Cape numberplates belong to. And those all-important Level 3 Water Restrictions for drought-stricken Cape Town.

The remainder of the Top 10 is filled with yesterday’s post in which I was tacitly described as being “very obviously common” and “probably something perfectly frightful like a Primitive Methodist”, Tuesday’s sharing of those wondrous aerial photographs, and -perhaps somewhat unexpectedly – images of a land crab from September 2010.
Nice, but uninformative.

My point stands though, in that while far less than half of the posts on here are “reference” or “information” posts, those posts still fill a disproportionate number of slots on my daily most popular post rankings.

People like to know things.

Maybe I should go full reference? After all, that’s what Wikipedia did and I believe that they are ever so popular.

Except that popularity isn’t why 6000 miles… exists. And it’s a good job too, to be honest. So I think that I’ll just keep sharing the good stuff, passing comment on silly people, venting my spleen on occasion – and making that all important information available where necessary, in an effort to make your day just a little bit better.

Don’t like it? Feel free to demand a full refund.

State Capture Report

Has our state been captured?

Have our President and Government been acting to improperly benefit “others”?

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Find out here [PDF, 2.65MB]

Spoiler: It’s basically a yes and a yes.