I mean it. I’ve looked at the audience that I know this blog has, and I can’t see anything but derision and incredulity coming my way for sharing this. I know that already a lot of people don’t go for the music posts I put on here (but MMIRIM), and even more people won’t like this song. Perhaps even people who don’t read this blog. In fact, almost certainly people who don’t read this blog. Many people.
They – Visages from Toulouse, Strategy from Salford (shame) – won’t mind. We’re all well out of their target audience.
Because it’s niche, it’s underground; it’s not usually even my sort of thing, but I heard it at just the right time and in just the right mood for it to make its mark. But it’s really very good.
It’s deep and bassy. It’s dark and brooding and sinister and threatening.
You can only guess what sort of mood I was in. (I mean, the adjectives are all there.)
In fact, it wouldn’t have even made it onto the blog were it not for one particular line which I had to triple listen to just to make sure I had got it right. Because I thought I had heard all the insults there were to hear. People seem to love to tell me them in emails, comments, on social media and in person. I am insult magnetic.
But there is always room for new blood in the insult game. And this one was full of fresh plasma and red cells. Because from about 3:56 in (and please pardon the language), I think he’s saying:
Go with the flow, yeah I wrote this one
On an old iPhone with a broken screen
Think you’re gonna try test man with a verse like that
You’re a fucking aubergine.
I mean, look, it scans. It somehow works (it’s mainly thanks to the drawn out tri-syllabic eggplant reference), but still…
Is that really the best the he could come up with? Or is this characteristic – common, even – as the sort of diss what the yoof is frowing down these days?
Wow. Specific vegetables* as slights and slurs now? Really?
Well, just bring it on, you bloomin’ heirloom tomatoes!
* technically, aubergines, fucking ones or otherwise, are berries, but:
“Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.”