Keep warm

We’re off out for a longstanding dinner date this evening – the arrangement of which, incidentally, demonstrated exactly how busy modern life can be – but having checked the weather forecast, I thought that my local readers would appreciate this photo given the wet, windy conditions expected over the weekend.

It doesn’t move, I’ll admit. That’s because it’s a photo. If you want movement, you’ll have to head over here and buy the DVD. That also comes with “a selection of different styles of fire and authentic noises”.

Here at, you get “my braai” and you have to imagine the sound of the bottle opener hard at work behind the camera. Red wine will be the order of the day, I would imagine.


Quota video time and since there’s no decent football on tonight due to the plethora of international friendlies tomorrow, I thought that I would remind myself of the Premiership by giving you the theme tune of the international feed for that league, Kasabian’s Fire.

There’s a South African link as well, since the video was shot just up the road in picturesque and sleepy Piketburg and was probably the biggest thing to hit the dorpie since the N7 was built. It’s not every day that some boys from Leicestershire decide to pop over and hold up the bank with guitars as weapons. Don’t press that panic button or I’ll riff you to death.

Kasabian’s tenuous link with football and television don’t begin with this theme song, however.
Who could forget that they provided the music for the Sony Bravia ad featuring Kaka and a giant zoetrope?

Not you, I’m sure.

DLP 011 EC

On a day when the South African Weather Service warned of a heat wave and the danger of runaway fires, the driver of this Ford Mondeo, registration plate DLP 011 EC – from the self-named “Friendly Province” – decided it was a good day to drop his lit cigarette butt out of the window.

Obviously, I beg to differ.
I’m anti-smoking, anti-littering, anti-Ford Mondeo and – thanks to the actions of this twat – anti-Eastern Cape today as well.

If you’re reading this Mr DLP 011 EC, as you surely will be, then tremble, for I have reported you to the infamous Cape Town Stompie Hotline on 021 424 7715. I gave them your licence plate details, a description of your car (I was almost ill doing this bit) and I told them exactly where the heinous crime was committed.

And they will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy the central reservation on the M5 at the Klipfontein on-ramp.
Or at least, they’ll be in touch with you and you might get a fine of up to R1,000. I wish it were more.

More here on the Stompie Hotline.

Please note, the Stompie Hotline is in no way connected with Stompie Moeketsi or Winnie Madikizela-Mandela; and if you suggest otherwise, then the ANC will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious… oh never mind.

What a difference a day made…

Twenty-four little hours.
Brought the smoke and the fires.
Where there used to be green.

Before and after – The Devils Peak Fire

Houses in High Cape and Vredehoek (where I used to live) were evacuated at 1 o’clock this morning as high winds threatened drive the fire into residential areas. Spectacular iol pictures.

Today, it’s just a matter of damping down what’s left of the vegetation and  putting out the fires in the kloofs on the Groote Schuur Estate. Just for an idea of scale, those three “little” fires you can see up at the top of the mountain have flames up to five storeys high according to the Cape Town Fire Department spokesman on the radio. S’big, then.