What a load of BS

I’m not planning to go into the city centre today, and that’s a good thing, because parked up in the harbour right next to that city centre (and right next to the Cruise Terminal, nogal!) is the Al Kuwait: a 190m, 16,110Mt livestock carrier owned by Croatian company Korkyra Shipping and stopping over from Rio Grande in Brazil as she heads east.

And she stinks.

According to Marine Traffic, the Al Kuwait is currently reporting a draught of 8.8m, which means that she is fully laden with livestock. This amounts to 23,474m2 of cattle. That’s about 50,000 studio apartments worth of space. And so it’s no wonder the residents of the CBD are up in arms over the whole situation – it’s not just about the smell, it’s clearly pure jealousy about all that extra space, as well.

Pity help the passengers of the Azamara Pursuit

…who have paid a ridiculous amount of money to sail into the Mother City and experience the fresh, clean Cape air, only to be parked next to this stinking floating farm truck (seen here under her previous moniker, Ocean Shearer – named after the Newcastle United football star’s daughter):

And now social media is alive with the cries of people desperate for the SPCA to board the vessel and check on the wellbeing of the 23,474m2 of cattle, as if this were the first time that a livestock carrier has ever docked in SA.

There are dead, decomposing animals on board

suggested one commenter, with absolutely no evidence whatsoever.

Aren’t human beings just the worst?

decried another keyboard warrior, who only found out that cows went on ships when a smelly boat parked up near her flat last night, but now thinks that the entire thing is terrible and must stop immediately.

Which is all fine, but is also such a kneejerk reaction which you can bet will likely be forgotten by tomorrow, by which time the Al Kuwait will be well on her way to her next port of call, taking her stench with her.

Bit of a moan – Pt.1

Part 2 may follow tomorrow. It may not.

But I’m fully aware that this is a moan. It even says so in the title. I’m not expecting anything to happen about this moan, although it would be nice (and really weird) if anything did.
Sometimes you just need to have a bit of a moan. Get things off your chest. This is one of those times.

Tourism. The lifeblood of the summer economy in Cape Town. Love them or hate them, tourists are plentiful and vital to keeping this country going.
This isn’t the first time I have lived in a tourist heavy city. I was in Oxford for almost a decade and that gets ridiculous numbers thanks to its proximity to London (and the whole of Europe). It’s also about 30 times smaller than Cape Town, so things can get very chaotic very quickly there.

Locally, comparative statistics are a bit difficult to gauge at the moment given the effects of the recent pandemic, but it does seem like the numbers of visitors this year will break all the previous records for people arriving to enjoy all that the Mother City has to offer.

I absolutely recognise the need for tourism as a valuable contributor to our economy.
But that doesn’t mean that I have to like it.

Still, as with any touristy place, if you avoid the touristy areas, you can avoid the tourists.

Just about…

There are two particular tourist “attractions” here that are seemingly unavoidable, incredibly intrusive and make life all a bit crap for the local residents.

The first is the Red Bus. Yep. I know you get them everywhere and they are a lot of fun. I’ve even done a couple of tours with the kids myself. But wow. Things have exploded recently. I mean, not literally, but…
Our roads are made for getting people from one place to another. When those roads are populated by any number of big red buses going around their two routes – here’s a shot from their “live bus tracker”:

Ah Jesus…

And of course they are deliberately driving at 20kph to give the visitors a nice leisurely view of the city and surrounds: on our suburban roads with 60 or 80kph limits. It causes a lot of congestion and a lot of frustration. Hugely disproportionate to the number of tourists actually using the service.

But that’s really nothing compared to the helicopter tours. Sure, they don’t cause traffic jams or delays, but could there be a more invasive, less eco-friendly way to annoy the local population? When the weather is good, there are no fires and the tourist season is on, we can get one every few minutes, coming over our back garden at (at best) a couple of hundred metres.

I’m not sure at what point the repeated noise, irritation, disturbance and greenhouse gas emissions:

would constitute a “hazard” as in (2)(a) there per se, but wow, if you not only want to have a look at the mountain, but also piss off everyone in the Southern Suburbs while you’re at it, then a helicopter flight is absolutely the way to do it.

Ironically, there’s one going over the house right now as I type, but then, that’s not very unusual.

There is even the double whammy, whereby you can book both these excursions on one single site.
A veritable synergy of local infuriation, at a discount price.
Who wouldn’t go for it?
No, I’m not providing a link.

So. Moan over. Did it turn into more of a rant? Does it even matter? Will it make any difference?

I’m off for a nap. If I can keep the noise out.

Lily QP

I’m hopefully somewhere up in the hot, dry North, so here’s a moister, more verdant image from a beagle walk last weekend:

For all that the weather is on the turn, Cape Town is still pretty soggy underfoot. The beagle went knee deep into the mud, but that was ok, because we didn’t take my car down to the Green Belt for our wander.

Just a reminder

You occasional/annual (when I remember) reminder that:

“There is snow on the mountains because it is cold.”

NOT

“It is cold because there is snow on the mountains.”

It seems to be a Cape Town old wives tale that the snow on the local mountains is somehow responsible for the chilly temperatures in the city.

Here’s the view from our bedroom (long lens, yes) yesterday.

But this isn’t a tricky “chicken or egg” situation. It get cold and then it snows.

Not the other way around.

Wet one

The big cold front which was expected to drop in at about 9pm this evening has – according to the word on the street* – already hit Hout Bay.

It’s horrible here

were the exact words that were used, prompting me to immediately type (and then tactfully delete) my reply:

I know. What’s the weather like?

And I do know.

But looking over that way, it does look as if the apocalypse might finally – mercifully – be upon us.

Thus, tonight will be full on Wuthering Heights stuff. Elemental. Cold, windy and wet, with Catherine’s ghost knocking on the window up to 50mm of rain forecast in the next 24 hours. And there’s another 50 on the way early next week.

This isn’t unusual for Cape Town in late autumn, but it is rather unpleasant. The draining effect of the cold, dreary weather is exacerbated by loadshedding, and in turn exacerbates it right back by increasing demand for more heating and light. In addition (of course), solar panels don’t help at all when there’s no sun, so backup batteries are charged from the grid (when it’s on) and that adds to demand and… er… exacerbates loadshedding.

A recipe for misery.

Except of course that every cloud (and I’m looking specifically about those ones rapidly approaching from the South Atlantic) has a silver lining. It wasn’t so long ago that we didn’t have any water at all in this corner of the continent, and we’d do well to remember the stress that little episode caused.

If (and it is always an if) the forecasts are correct, then we could be looking at anything up to 8 or maybe even 10% added to the dams by this time next week.

So always look on the bright side of life (unless you’re in one of those 4½ hour slots of darkness, during which time, there is no bright available).

* a Whatsapp message from the horse-riding instructor.