Have you ever got so drunk…

…that you missed the team flight to South America?

“On Saturday night, whilst out for an informal dinner in Auckland, I made a poor decision regarding the limits of my alcohol intake.
This has resulted in the unacceptable action of me being absent from All Blacks assembly on Sunday morning and thus missing the team flight to Argentina.”

Still, that line: “I made a poor decision regarding the limits of my alcohol intake”?
That’s the best way of saying “I got really pissed” that I’ve heard in a while. Maybe it could be adapted to other situations as well:

“In the early hours of Thursday morning, whilst in my Pretoria home, I made a poor decision regarding the limits of my criminal responsibility.”

or:

“Since 2009, whilst being President of the Republic of South Africa, I repeatedly made poor decisions regarding the limits of my personal architectural and construction budget.”

But still – how does that happen? No, not the Nkandla thing. How does an international rugby player – or indeed even an international rugby team not have some sort of fail safe backup plan for getting their players to the airport on time? No, they shouldn’t need one, but as this incident proves, they obviously do need one.

Still, with the All Blacks having suspended Aaron Cruden (for it was he) for two games, Argentina must really be fancying their chances against the world champions now. *cough*
Presumably, they’ve already got their “poor decision regarding the limits of their rugby playing abilities” statement ready in case they don’t manage a win in La Plata on Saturday.