Real culprit named

Not much time to blog today, but I did catch this and thought I should share.

It turns out that – perhaps unsurprisingly, given their apparent monumental incompetence – the SAPS picked up the wrong guy when they arrested Oscar Pistorius. It wasn’t his fault.

Much like wrong-doing South African sportsmen before him, “it was the Devil what made him do it”, according to a local pastor, anyway.

“Oscar did not kill her [Steenkamp], Satan made him do it. I pray to God to help him,” reverend Isaac Malaza said.

This is the latest in a very long line of naughty things which Satan has made people do, and quite frankly, I think he should be brought in to face some questioning now. It does all appear to be circumstantial evidence pointing in his direction, but there’s no smoke without the Eternal Fires of Hades.

However, not only does Isaac come to the party with this radical new accusation, he also comes with reassurance:

“I came today to pray for Oscar. He shouldn’t do something like this again that breaks the hearts of his family.”

Which is, and I think I speak for all of us here in saying this, probably a really good idea.

But wait, there’s more – Isaac has this astounding insight for us as well:

He said Steenkamp’s parents and family were also left heartbroken.

Who knew? Maybe there’s something in this whole religion thing after all. I would have never guessed that this was the case were it not for the keen mind of Isaac Malaza and the ace reporting skills of the South African Press Association.

Thanks for the heads up, guys.