There and being assessed

Yes, it’s another Vodacom Tablet Repair Update. By SMS.

1315: Job Number XXXXXXX has been received at the Advanced Repair Centre

This is good news. Being Pseudo-Capetonian, I’m always concerned over the safety of loved ones and loved things when they head up onto the hijacker-filled, e-Tolled highways of Gauteng. Thankfully, my broken tablet has made it all the way to the ARC, where presumably it will be joined by another broken tablet, and two of every other sort of defunct device, and be safe from the 40 days of rain which has been widely forecasted by Russell Crowe.

But wait, there’s more:

1345: Job Number XXXXXXX is currently in the assessment process at the Advanced Repair Centre

Game on. They’re having a look at it. This bit shouldn’t take too long, because I have already told them what’s up with it.

In fact, probably my biggest concern here is what my broken tablet was doing for the 30 minutes between SMSs. I can only presume that the ARC is so big that it actually takes 30 minutes to get from the Reception to the Assessment bit. One would think that – for reasons of efficiency – these two hives of activity would obviously be next to one another.

Equally concerning is the lack of any further promise to keep me informed by SMS.
Is this where it all ends, where the trail runs dry, where the toilet door slams?

I anxiously await the next installment, where my broken tablet hopefully heads to the Repair section – or even the Advanced Repair section – of the Advanced Repair Centre.

It’s enthralling, isn’t it?

Very Proud

Wow. What an intense 90 minutes of football yesterday. How good was that match compared with the dull sterility of Saturday’s semi-final? It must have been brilliant for the neutrals. Sadly, I’m not a neutral in this particular case and it was a sad end to our amazing FA Cup run, but what a way to go out. As the Nike adverts surrounding the field repeatedly proclaimed:

If you go down in flames, at least you were on fire.

And yes, we were. Aside from fifteen crazy minutes just after half time, including that one Ricky Villaesque run from Tom Huddlestone [“Tackle him! TACKLE HIM!!!”], we matched Premiership Hull City blow for blow and the team made us all very proud. Gone was the Wembley “stage fright” from previous visits, as we went all out for it from the first minute. From the Yorkshire Post:

Yesterday, dreams of becoming the first team from the third tier of English football to reach the FA Cup final died amid Hull’s superior football. But in a first half where United assumed control and then a late rally that briefly brought hope of forcing extra time, Clough’s men did their superb travelling army of fans justice.
No wonder that the hordes from Sheffield afforded their players a standing ovation at the final whistle. It was thoroughly deserved, and not just for yesterday’s efforts with the manner in which Clough has transformed the Blades being nothing short of remarkable.

The future is looking bright.

I went through every kind of emotion over the 90 minutes and together with the heat (and possibly a couple of rather strong homebrewed wheat beers), it left me completely exhausted. I’m not quite sure what state the Blades players were in, but if the Sheffield Star is to be believed, they had some… er… “male issues” at the final whistle.

star

Hmm. “Prostate on the turf”? Some problems with their R’s there.

Thankfully, all I had to do was wander upstairs to my (stupidly hot) bedroom. Many of the United fans had a long trip back up from London, arriving back in Sheffield well after midnight.

All in all, an amazing effort and a magical cup run, which started away against Colchester United early last November.

We’ll just have to win it next year instead…

Wembley again

Big day today, as my beloved Red and White Wizards head down to Wembley Stadium for the FA Cup semi-final against Hull City. My Dad and brother will be there and I’ll try (as before) to guide them safely in. I’ve seen United in 3 FA Cup semi-finals, all of them with us in a far better situation than our current League One position. In fact, if we win today, we’ll the first club in over a century to get to the final while playing in the “third tier”.
However, our record in those semi finals is “less than great”, sitting at 0-3.

Not for want of trying though. Who could forget this amazing moment from our 0-1 defeat to Arsenal at Old Trafford in 2003?

That’s how close we were. I was sitting (obviously, I wasn’t actually “sitting” at this point, but the point still stands (pun intended)) looking right along the goalline and I still cannot explain how Seaman kept that out.

But that was then and this is now. Sadly, our recent record in Wembley games is equally poor. The omens, they are not good, but I do like this sentiment from our manager:

1899993_10152213909002707_900878109_n

Because given our circumstances and the teams we have had to play (and beat) to get to this point, we should already be proud of what we’ve achieved, but what’s the point of resting on our laurels now? It’s been the way for a while in this cup run that any step further would be something amazing. So why not go for one more?

33,000 Blades fans will be there to cheer them on:

Retail Sales Manager Lisa Crossland said:
“As quick as new merchandise is coming in, it is selling. This morning alone (Tuesday) we have sold more than 800 T-shirts, 600 flags, 300 car flags, 250 foam Wembley hands.”

I’ve long since given up on trying to predict the outcomes of Sheffield United games, save to predict them as being generally unpredictable. In getting this far, the team has already proven that we have the ability, we have the belief. Now we just have to go out and put it all into practice this afternoon.

Hold thumbs.

PistoriusBalls 13

Again, it’s time for a serious note, a further observation.
Since Oscar Pistorius has come onto the stand – or perhaps rather since Gerrie Nel has begun his annihilation cross-examination – the spurious tweets have (mostly) dropped off. I think that the assorted journos feel that this is the moment that they’ve been waiting for: the bit that everyone wants to see. The immediate analysis has almost completely disappeared – suddenly it’s just facts being reported.

Mainly, anyway.

Which is most of the time.

 

These Kendrick Lamar lyrics could be the mantra of the trial journalists.

 

Yes, but remember to take turns on the swings in the playground.

 

“How long have we been here now?”
“No idea. I’ve completely lost track of time. 20 days? 21?”
“Meh – you put 20 and I’ll go for 21. No-one will notice.”

2021

 

Ass prosecutor? Blimey. What a specialised position. Just imagine if OP’s ass is aquitted but the rest of him ends up in prison. How would that even work? 

 

Also, they need to stop the Bulls playing rugby, Sundowns’ push for the league title, anything to do with the Union Buildings and prevent any of the 1.4million residents doing anything that might get in your way.