Tiger Woods’ car crash news is breaking all over Twitter.
Woods, 33, pulled out of his driveway in the Isleworth community about 2:25 a.m. when he struck a fire hydrant, and then drove into a tree at his neighbor’s property, FHP reported.
Woods was apparently taken to a nearby hospital “in a seriously rat-arsed condition”.
I don’t know about you, but I’m always striking fire hydrants and then driving into my neighbour’s arboreal vegetation in the early hours of the morning. I like to test to see how quickly the local council can get out to stem the big fountain of water that spews from the broken faucet. If they arrive before it gets light, I feel that my exorbitant rates bill is doing at least some good.
Next door’s tree just annoys me by dropping leaves in my pool so I try and knock it down while I’m out damaging the car: it saves time and effort just billing the insurance once.
I’m not drunk when I do that though. Honest.