I’m not lion

Following up on last week’s incursions of hippo into swimming pools in Limpopo and just generally into Cape Town, Essex over in the UK decided not to be outdone and has allegedly got a lion on the loose.
As Sky News reports:

The sighting is believed to be genuine after experts at Colchester Zoo viewed a photograph of the ‘lion’ taken by a local.

But quote of the moment has to go to Che Kevlin:

Che Kevlin said he heard what he believed to be a roar whilst out walking his dog on Sunday night.
“It sounded like the roar of a lion. We have a field and wood just behind our fence, so you never know.”

I didn’t hear many roars when I lived in the UK, but when I did, I automatically assumed that there was a lion in the field and wood behind my house.

Authorities are asking Essex residents to check their swimming pools for the presence of African wildlife and also to report any suddenly missing pets.

UPDATE: As Essex Police call off the search for the “lion”

The numerous sightings were probably of a ‘large domestic cat’

There are a couple of people who disagree. Vehemently.

Rich Baker, 39, was walking with his two boys, aged nine and 11 when the drama unfolded.
He said: ‘A man started running towards us yelling “It’s a f****** lion!”
He looked so panicked you knew it was not a joke. The lion you could see it from the side.

“It was one million per cent a lion. It was a tan colour with a big mane, it was fully grown, it was definitely a lion. It was just standing there, it seemed to be enjoying itself.”

Hang on, what?

“It seemed to be enjoying itself”?

How did you work that out, Rich? Was it smiling then? Or doing that kind of smug grin thing that fully grown lions do when they’re just standing there enjoying themselves? Are you really some sort of  veterinary psychologist or were you just passing idle comment about the lion’s emotional state?

The Daily Mail (sorry) article also quotes ‘Mrs Wright, a housewife and a mother of three, from Dagenham, Essex’:

The moment I saw it, straight away I said ‘That looks like a lioness”

Which is interesting, as lionesses obviously don’t have manes; not like the beast Rich Baker saw.

All of which leads me to believe that there may be two large domestic cats currently roaming Essex and terrifying the local population.

Lock up your mice, people…