A day

It was a day. Some stuff went well, some stuff didn’t. And that was the case even if stuff got sub-catagorised: for example, bits of the football were good, others not. And now I’m watching Chelsea and Spurs kicking chunks out of each other.

It ended – the day, not the FA Cup semi final – with me wandering around in the dark, barefoot, 200 metres around the corner up the road from our house, chasing an UberEats driver who had already taken 35 minutes to do a 5 minute trip. Guess how nice our food was?

The UberEats experience didn’t have a positive side.

Tomorrow will also be a day. Hopefully with less UberEats and more happy bits.

Golf

Golf. Sport of Kings. Or is that Polo? Whatever, I’m not a fan of golf.
Golf is dull.

Fans of golf – you know who you are – will tell you that it’s not dull. They’ll tell you about that exciting finish to the Ryder Cup in 2012 or some such, and yes, perhaps for that putt, we all held our collective breaths, at least briefly. But it took us four days of repeated five hour games of golf to get there! Dull.

And then there’s the fact that if you want to play some golf, you basically have to schedule most of a day for it. It’s not an hour’s footy, or a 30 minute run round the block. It’s most of a day.
Ain’t nobody got time for that.

Still, I just think that golf is dull. Brian Micklethwait feels slightly more strongly than that:

I still hate and fear golf.

A little more digging (I clicked a link) reveals that it seems to be the same issue with the length of time the whole process takes that’s the root of his hatred and fearfulness:

I remember once having a go at it, when I was at my expensive public school in the middle of the last century.  I still remember hitting one golf ball really sweetly and deciding, right then and there, that I would never do this again, because if I did, there was a definite danger that golf would take over my entire life.  And I wasn’t having that.

Brian does like cricket though, including test cricket, which for me falls into the same “occasionally a really exciting last few minutes but to be fair it took things an awfully long time to get there” category as golf.

The difference is that cricket has noticed this issue and adapted with one dayers and T20s. Horrible for the purists, but key in saving the sport.
Golf, though? Golf has only just agreed to let women be members at its most famous clubs (although they’re not allowed to change there).

So golf is actually old-fashioned, sexist and dull. And it takes ages.

No, thank you.

Champions!

After they gained promotion while I was camping by the Orange River, Sheffield United were crowned League One Champions this afternoon, after Bolton failed to beat Oldham in the Lancashire derby.

I may have shed a tear.

This makes the Blades only the third ever team to win all four divisions of the English league. It’s been a great season, and I’m actually rather hopeful for our chances of a decent finish in the Championship next year.
But that’s still months away, and we have three more games to play this season.
The pressure is off for once, so why not enjoy them? It’s going to be well-deserved party time at Beautiful Downtown Bramall Lane for the next few weeks.

Big Night

Well, it could be, but I’m not getting my hopes up just yet. Still, that’s not stopped thousands of fans from queuing up around the block at Beautiful Downtown Bramall Lane to try and get tickets for the match later.

It’s these sort of evenings that remind you how difficult it is to support your club from afar. The atmosphere is going to be electric and I would love to be there, but I will have to make do with watching Premiership footy on my sofa and not straying too far from Whatsapp.

And of course, if it doesn’t work out tonight, there are still plenty more opportunities for promotion to be secured – the next one being on Saturday. Still, it would be nice to get things sorted this evening.

Apparently, I’m supposed to put stuff like #ForgedInSteel and #RedAndWhiteWizards here, but let’s rather settle for #NevouslyDrinkingBrandyOnTheCouchInCapeTown.

Defeatwood Town

Bad news for those of you not into football, because I am into football and today, despite the fact that my team didn’t actually play, has been a good day.

Let’s mentally wander up to Uwe Rösler’s Highbury Stadium (no, not that one, this one) and enjoy Nicky Ajose’s late goal for relegation threatened Swindon Town.

That goal means that Fleetwood Town lost today, and remain in third place in League One on 69 points.

With only the top two guaranteed to go up, I’ve been doing some rudimentary calculations and I reckon that even if they were to win all of their remaining 6 games, Fleetwood can ‘only’ get 87 points.

That means that if Sheffield United can win just two more games (taking them to 88 points) they are assured of promotion.

FINALLY!!!!!!!

However, further rudimentary calculations suggest that if Sheffield United win on Wednesday at home to Coventry, and Fleetwood lose on the same evening at Oxford – it’s a done deal.

I am going to be a quivering wreck of emotions and mounting anticipation this week.

Be gentle.