Oh Christ – we beat the pigs!

Such were the unusual circumstances in which I found myself over the weekend and such were the demands of Sky TV for a Friday evening kick off that I’ve just had a “oh christ, I’ve left the iron on!” moment.

score

I can’t believe I didn’t blog about this earlier, but I see no harm in blogging about it now.

derby1

Not that there’s much to blog about. Thrilling game. We won, they didn’t.

Which is all as it should be.

Eccy Rd Hoff Stolen

Via @arepeejee and @sheffieldblog on twitter:

Hoff is gone
Hoff is gone

One can only hope that Sky News run with this like they did with Madeleine McCann (not literally) but with a more successful outcome. That’s probably the only way that the Hoff will be found.

However – and here’s a note to people up and down Ecclesall Road whose Hoff has been stolen – it would be more helpful if the posters in the window actually detailed exactly how we could help. What exactly do you need us to do?

Further information surrounding his disappearance would also be of assistance: When did it happen? Had he been drinking? Did you note any suspicious characters around? Did he leave his orange shorts? And have you informed the police (other than by way of handwritten posters in the front window)?

I’m sure we all hope that the Hoff is recovered soon and will watch the front windows of Eccy Rd for further updates.

Afterthought: Just noted that it actually states “the Hoff was stolen”. Perhaps this is some admission that the Hoff, who presumably used to be in their possession was actually not their Hoff to begin with. Or something.

Tonight…


what’s where at bramall lane, originally uploaded by evissa.

While tomorrow sees the first games of the new Championship season in England, there’s one game that was so big, it needed a day all of its own. Or something.
That game is the titanic battle between promotion favourites Middlesbrough and promotion favourites Sheffield United at the Riverside Stadium. And it all kicks off tonight at 8pm (UK time).
Fortunately, Sky TV have recognised the gravity of this clash – probably after noting that last season, promotion favourites United were also drawn away at promotion favourites Birmingham City, who later went on to er… be promoted.
In an added twist of fortune, SuperSport have recognised that Sky have recognised the gravity of this clash and have also decided to screen it. In South Africa. Tonight. Live.

After the bitter disappointment of last season (which was actually only 9 weeks ago, give or take), it’s hard to raise my hopes yet again, but somehow, I will. I always do. I always will.

So, COME ON YOU RED AND WHITE WIZZZZZAAAAARDS!
(noting that, of course, you’ll be in your away strip for this evening’s game)

Amazon.co.uk #fail

I got my Dad two brilliant books for Father’s Day. He’ll love them, if amazon.co.uk and their “premium” courier company, ShittyLink, ever actually get around to delivering them.

The story so far = two failed delivery attempts + a wasted day + a stinking email complaint + a grovelling reply.

But still no books.

Bring forth the sarcasm and the crying child: 

Thanks for your last email. I was consoled. 

Briefly. 

However, my father has had to continually ring Citylink and (having stayed in all day as he said he would) has now found out that the parcel has been in Rotherham all day. Poor parcel. But that’s beside the point. 

So – you (or rather your courier) didn’t manage to leave a note when they allegedly came to deliver the parcel on Saturday, didn’t fulfill their obligation to deliver after 10:30am on Monday and have failed to show up at all today despite my Dad wasting his entire day at home. 

In summary, it’s not great, is it? 

You know, I actually have no problem when things sometimes go awry. It happens to all of us from time to time. I used to work in a hospital lab and once almost killed a patient by mistake. (She got better). But when a company has one task – namely to courier goods from one place to another, not anything as taxing as therapeutic drug monitoring (which is really difficult and can easily go wrong) – and they mess it up time and time and time again, it annoys me. When they repeatedly waste the time and effort of their customers, that annoys me more. And when they claim to be offering this as a “premium service” – well, it’s just like some sort of sick joke, isn’t it?
I want to laugh, but I can’t. I hurt too much.

Truly, it probably doesn’t even matter when this order turns up now. You’ve ruined Father’s Day for my Dad; you’ve wasted an entire day of his life today and you’ve wasted his money in having to chase your “premium” courier company all over South Yorkshire on the phone. 

My 3 year old son keeps asking why Granddad hasn’t said thank you for his books. I told him that the useless company I ordered them from couldn’t get their arses into gear to organise a simple delivery. He cried. Copiously.
I reckon that’s basically a whole lifetime of potential orders you’ve lost – and who can blame him? 

I look forward to hearing how you plan to sort this out.

It’s raining here in Cape Town, I’m off to the rugby this evening and have plans for tomorrow as well, so I’d appreciate some sort of solution preferably within 48 minutes and not the 48 hours you promised in your last email. 

Yours, in foolishly optimistic anticipation,

6k.

I’m actually really disappointed. I’ve only used amazon.co.uk three times over the past year or so and this is the second time that they’ve let me down. Suffice to say, it’s going to take a lot to get me to use them again.

Tomorrow: my next letter to them, because the books blatantly aren’t going to arrive plus a report on what could be the muddiest game of rugby ever. It’s been raining HEAVILY for 24 hours all over Newlands. Handling errors deluxe.

Lead balloon

Well, that was suitably depressing.

Same time, same place next year, I guess.

Think I’m still in shock, so more may follow, probably involving swear words and general anger.

 

My god, that Mike Dean is a complete twat.

Ooh look! It’s started already!