Photo of a blonde girl with an Eastern European parliament building between her legs

No. 1 in a series of 1. Or so I’m guessing, anyway.


From here, but I’m really not sure how or why.

The trouble with starting a series like this on one’s blog is that there are often limited opportunities for continuing it. But that’s what makes it special, exclusive, unique.
Everyone has got photos of brunette girls with Eastern European parliament buildings between their legs; or photos of blonde girls with Western European parliament buildings between their legs. So why bother with that run-of-the-mill stuff?

It’s going the extra mile that makes this blog stand out from all those others.

Next week we begin our much anticipated series of posts of charcoal drawings of West African freshwater fish lying in wooden boxes.

Much like you, I can hardly wait.

3D Changes in domestic paste

One of the gifts which Alex got for his third birthday was a packet of Ben 10 stickers. Ben 10 is, apparently, a kiddie superhero  cartoon character who can be found on Cartoon Network, pajamas, backpacks, t-shirts and indeed, stickers. I have no other knowledge of this Ben 10 character, because Alex is still too young for Cartoon Network.
That, however, has not stopped him from becoming a big fan of Ben 10.

The other thing you should know about these Ben 10 stickers is that they are those cool ones that move (ever so slightly) when you tilt them from side to side a bit. If your hands are fast enough, you can make Ben 10 look like he is having a fit. And anyone watching you will probably think you’re having a fit as well. But that kind of thing is funny if you’re three.
And stickers are great if you are three years old, because you can stick them anywhere you can reach: in your sticker album, on your wardrobe, on your window, the inside of the en-suite toilet bowl, your little sister’s head – anywhere.

Anyway, I am glad that I could identify who and what the stickers were, because being completely honest, the packet they came in wasn’t overly helpful:

3D Changes in domestic paste – the perfect gift for any child’s third birthday

And, as if to explain exactly what 3D changes in domestic paste is, there are some fishes swimming around some conservatory furniture. Maybe they were thinking fish paste. I don’t know.
To me it looks like there was an incident in the printing department and random words and graphics dropped into the Ben 10 sticker packet machine.

Either way, the stickers are a hit and have mainly gone into his sticker album, where they are making explosions and shooting lasers at the Winnie the Pooh Flat shine on bedroom glue.

‘What are you people doing up here?’

That’s what Ugandan President Yoweri Museveni said he wants to ask the Americans, during an address to an assembly of Uganda’s top lawyers on Saturday. “Up here” refers to space, apparently – specifically the moon.

“Uganda alone cannot go to the moon. We are too small. But East Africa united can. That is what East African integration is all about,” he said. “Then we can say to the Americans: ‘What are you doing here all alone?’.”

I’ve never been to Uganda, but I have spoken with some people there using the medium of the telephone. While Africa may lag some distance behind the rest of the world, in urban areas, basic stuff like telephones are a given.
Kampala, particularly, has a fairly decent telecommunications network, which makes me wonder why Mr Museveni can’t just call some Americans on the phone and ask them what they are doing on the moon. A quick google search of “NASA telephone numbers” gives NASA HQ’s number as (202) 358-0000. I think you add a 1 before that to get to the USA, if that helps at all, Mr President.

Even if they are currently all alone on the moon, just leave a voicemail and they’ll get back to you as soon as they return. And then they can tell you what they were doing up there.  You won’t need to spend billions of Ugandan Shillings (at 2207.50 to the US dollar) on a costly, dangerous and lengthy space programme, you’ll just have to cough up for an international phone call.

If you get Skype, it’ll be even cheaper.

“The Americans have gone to the moon. And the Russians. The Chinese and Indians will go there soon. Africans are the only ones who are stuck here,” Museveni said.

Well, yes. The Africans, certainly. And the Peruvians. Don’t forget them. And the Spanish. And the Saudi Arabians. But Saudi Arabia is a great place and they probably don’t want to leave anyway. And the Welsh. And the Swiss. Nice mountains; great cows. And the Malaysians – most of them have never even been outside Malaysia, let alone to the moon. And the… [continues ad nauseum]

Photo of a man in traditional African dress, riding a unicycle, with a table on his head

Yep. You read right.

His inverted table legs lost amongst the masts and cranes of the Waterfront and Cape Town harbour.

Taken by Mrs 6000 on Wednesday. Even more fishy pics here.

DA landslide ‘destroys Zuma, ANC’

Democratic Alliance take shock landslide victory in South African elections, suggests exit poll.

According to the results of an exit poll conducted during the National and Provincial elections yesterday and published after the ballots had closed in the late evening, the DA is heading for a unprecedented landslide victory over the much-fancied ANC and seems likely to take as much as 94% of the vote.

The exit poll was taken outside the Polling Station at St. Laadedah Primary School in Cape Town’s upmarket Constantia suburb by independent survey company Census Reviews and Polls (CRaP) and showed that of sixteen voters leaving the station who expressed an opinion, fifteen (93.75%) had voted for the DA.

DA spokesperson Jannie van Wyk was excited by the results:

I recognise that this is just one exit poll, but if we extrapolate the results from this significant survey, we can see that it is obvious that our policies and campaign strategies have borne fruit. A 94% share of the vote is significantly up from our showing at the last election, which was 12%, and I think we can put that down to our hard work in offering the voting public a viable alternative the Jacob Zuma and the ANC.
With this landslide victory, we can work on putting those policies into action as we will presumably control nine of the nine provinces which were contested as well as the national government. In fact, with sure a significant majority in these South African elections, I see this as an opportunity for the DA to move into the rest of Africa and envisage Helen Zille as being Supreme Commander of the World by 2015. It’ll take a bit of tinkering with the Constitution, but that won’t be a problem with this sort of majority.

In fact, according to the exit poll, Jacob Zuma’s ANC have been wiped off the South African political map completely, having gained exactly 0% of the vote in Constantia Ward 76, while newcomers the Congress of the People (Cope) managed just 6%.

Cope heavyweight Mbhazima “Sam” Shilowa was disappointed by the poll:

I have to say that we were hoping to make double figures in this election. The party is just four months old, but I though we had gained more popular support than this on our anti-corruption ticket.
However, looking at the overall result, I think it will finally lay to rest the rumour that we were going to enter into a coalition with the ANC after the election. They clearly have less to bring to the table than we thought they would. Well, absolutely nothing actually. Not a sausage. Shame.

Other large parties who, according to the CRaP poll, failed to get a single vote nationally included the Independent Democrats (ID), Vryheids Front Plus (VF+) and the Inkatha Freedom Party (IFP).
The Afrikaner VF+ were however, quick to disregard the results the Constantia poll though, saying that they preferred to base their predictions for the final outcome on an exit poll from Durbanville in Cape Town’s Northern suburbs, in which they had polled 100% of the votes cast, based on a sample size of 3.