Quake it up baby now

Apologies if you have just experienced that minor tsunami off the Atlantic Seaboard. I was just doing some sit-ups and I sneezed. I do hope Camps Bay and its infamous residents are all ok.

Of course, this happens to the best of us. Take Deepak Chopra who was meditating on Shiva mantra and accidentally caused a 7.2 magnitude earthquake on Sunday afternoon. Seriously:

Had a powerful meditation just now – caused an earthquake in Southern California. 

As Dan Evon writes, saying sorry is the least Chopra could do:

The earthquake Sunday destroyed homes, schools, and left thousands of people without electricity. If Chopra is responsible for the earthquake, he owes the world a little more than an apology.

As I mentioned above, Chopra is not the only one bearing this awesome responsibility: just this evening, I wasn’t meditating and absolutely nothing happened.


Google Ads Cat’s Eye Love

Since my excitement over the wonderful new road-based traffic lights in Lower Buitengracht, my google ads (subtly placed all over the site for your clickthrough delectation) have been going crazy for all things cat’s eyes. The company that seems to have benefited most from this sudden new trend is NightSight LED products. It’s a niche market and I guess that these sort of ads are aimed more at technical websites in the construction sector. 
You know, the sort of people who should be blogging about cat’s eyes.
In the same way, the Korean marine safety products that google put all over the post on the Fishhoek shark attack were aimed at the shipping sector and not about a commentary on someone getting eaten in Fishhoek bay. (It’s worth pointing out that none of the Korean marine safety
products advertised would have helped the unfortunate swimmer, incidentally.)

NightSight have got some really odd stuff in their 2008 catalogue (which seems to be the most recent available).
For example, what is “fibreglass nosing”? 
They also have some awesome stuff: who in their right mind could resist the “Glow Mining  Helmet” or the concerningly-named “Solar Road Flares”? Not me – I’ve ordered several of each. 
This company is undoubtedly the first place you should visit before your next outing to a fancy dress party dressed as any sort of robot or individual with a shiny helmet. You’ll be the talk of the jol.

I’m going to start paying more attention to google ads from now on. Obviously, I’m not allowed to click through my own (nor can I suggest that you should either), but my new aim in life (apart from the obvious world domination thing) is to find the weirdest products advertised by google ads.

I would guess, from what I’ve seen so far,  that the competition will be quite stiff.

The End


I’m going to keep this brief, because it’s a difficult thing to write. Following on from yesterday’s post and the situation it described and following a lot of thought during a very sleepless night, I have decided to pull the plug on 6000 miles… with immediate effect.
While I have enjoyed much of my time writing all sorts of nonsense on all sorts of subjects, it has become too difficult to fit quality blogging into a hugely busy schedule.

The rise and rise of this blog has made me very proud and I would hate to see it deteriorate to the level of certain other sites. Therefore I think it’s best to go out at the top – or as high as I got, anyway.

Many thanks are due to Mrs 6k for putting up with this extra individual in our lives and to The Guru, without whom much stuff would never have happened. But most of all to you, the readers – especially those loyal and regular commenters.

It’s been a fun ride.


Noon update: Some of my favourite other April Fools included “Labour’s new “Tough Guy” approach” to the election campaign in The Guardian, News24’s “National Anthems to be banned at the World Cup” and The Independent‘s LHC II on the Circle Line brilliance:

It would mean that two beams of protons would be travelling in clockwise and counterclockwise directions at 99.999999 per cent of the speed of light, within feet of Circle line passengers stuck in perpetual immobility.

None of which had me fooled for a moment.
Just like you and this post, right?

Dan and Dan on the Daily Mail

We’ve had more than a couple of run-ins with the useless tabloid rag which is Britain’s Daily Mail here on 6000 miles…
There was that Peter Hitchens racist nonsense, their laughably inaccurate reporting on the Fishhoek shark attack and then, more recently, the whole Jacob “Vile Buffoon” Zuma thing during JZ’s state visit to Britain.

It is, without a doubt, the most disgusting piece of racist, middle-England, scaremongering purveyor of  bullshit that I have ever had the displeasure to read.
And, as Britain goes down the drain, it’s steadily getting worse.
So I was hugely amused to see that Dan & Dan have done a little ditty entitled The Daily Mail Song.

The “cancer from your…” verse is just perfect.

Now, I think I’m going to go and wash my computer.
And, to be honest, so should you.

UPDATE: Right click/Save as to download the mp3 here.

That’s not a gopher

Driving out of the car park at my new favourite drinking spot (which shall remain nameless so I can avoid the vast numbers of vigilante groupies that went after the unfortunate Fireman’s bouncer I mentioned yesterday), I happened to spot a Toyota RunX.
This one had one of those personalised number plates that I don’t really like, but at least this one was for business purposes. Almost excusable, then.

Here it is (you can see the whole car here):

Obviously, Gopher can like to be your number one choice (or close to it) when you’re looking for industrial property in Cape Town.
But not, it seems, if you are looking for accurate descriptions of small mammals. Because that thing under the ‘X’ of ‘RunX’ is not a gopher, Geomyidae spp.. It’s a meerkat, Suricata suricatta.
Which is all nice and African, since gophers are only found in the Americas and meerkats are far more local, but that’s like Hippo insurance brokers advertising their services with a picture of an elephant. Just foolish.

One gopher, Two meerkats. It’s not difficult.

Look. See how different they are? OK, so they both appear to have the ability to stand on their hind legs, but I once saw a bear do that on some BBC documentary programme (although, to be fair, it was chained by its neck to a pole and was being beaten with a big stick by a vodka-drinking Siberian bloke with a wild beard and an even wilder temper).

Up! Get up, you bastard!
Up! Or I’ll have you made into carpet slippers!

Hell, sometimes I can even manage to stand for a few brief seconds after 8 pints of Stella, so it’s nothing special.
And look how much bigger the gopher is than the meerkats. How anyone could ever confuse the t… sorry?… Ah, ok. Thanks.
Sorry – apparently the gopher just looks bigger because it is nearer the camera. The meerkats are far away….

But seriously – noting that the car has Irish badges all over the back windscreen – talk about reinforcing the stereotype…

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