Cars Ad

Even though I’m not a movie fan, I really enjoyed this Walmart ad.

What a catchy way to promote their new pick up service. I wouldn’t be at all surprised to learn that the Ad Wizard was somehow involved in this project.

 

Ok. Maybe a bit surprised.

You need a lot of documentation to see Ed Sheeran

Going to see Ed Sheeran at one of his upcoming concerts in Johannesbeagle or Cape Town?

Think you can turn up with just a ticket and walk right in?

Think again.

There are several (or more) documents that you might need to provide on the night if you’re going to be allowed in to see and hear the ginger crooner. I found this out quite by chance – Big Concerts hasn’t yet been in touch to tell me about it. That’s why I’m sharing it with you.
Because I bought tickets for Mrs 6000 and The Scoop and they wouldn’t have got in if I hadn’t seen this page, featuring this information:

There’s a similar one for Joburg too.

And yes, it’ll be a mess and they’ll end up not checking everyone’s documents and people will complain that they brought them along for nothing. And yes, some people who do get checked will not have the documentation and there will be some shouting and a fight.

It’s even a bit vague about what you actually need to bring, and given that this is an event in South Africa, so the security probably won’t have been suitably briefed anyway, I’d bring everything on the list. And lots of other things too.
Smile nicely, be polite throughout, baffle with bullshit, gain entry.
Standard practice.

As usual, I would wholeheartedly advise parking in the P1 parking at the CTICC for a quick getaway once you’ve shuttled (free) into town from the stadium.

Please share this information so no-one gets locked out. Ed might not be your cup of tea (he’s certainly not mine), but imagine missing a concert you had bought tickets for, simply because you didn’t have a printed A4 PDF with someone’s name on it. Madness.

What is bacteria?

Spotted at the gym yesterday morning. Several million flyers, all asking the same question:

To which my immediate answer was clearly: It are a plural.

Fan Man: A new breed of superhero

The Blades were brilliant last night in the gale force wind at Beautiful Downtown Bramall Lane.
1-0 up halfway through the first half thanks to a wholly legitimate penalty, it was all going so well until Gary Madine had a rush of blood to the studs ten minutes later and scythed down one of their midfielders for a wholly legitimate straight red card.

What followed was a masterclass in prolonged, committed, uncompromising defending as wave upon wave of Brentford attack bore down upon the United goal. Sure, we rode our luck a couple of times, but these stats don’t tell any lies. It was an absolute siege, and we survived.

As you can see, the final score was 2-0, but there was a particularly squeaky bum patch just before we got that all-important second goal, where there seemed no way out for United. Every clearance came straight back, and every attack seemed certain to end with an equaliser.
So, picture the scene after 67 minutes, when the ball was cleared out for a Brentford throw-in and one fan on John Street decided that he was going to be a hero and waste a bit of time as the Brentford player asked him to pass the ball…

Oof. Still, at least it hasn’t made it onto computer screens all around the world, thanks to the power of social media and South Africa’s favourite blog.

That would be awful.

The highlights package isn’t out yet, and generally, they don’t put this sort of thing in anyway, but I’ll link to it when I see it. Just in case.
And also to remember one of the great Sheffield United performances of recent years.

COYRAWW!

It me

I actually thought that this article was about me, until I (thankfully) realised that I was still alive and well, having avoided the strong, unpleasant and all-pervading odour in my local shopping mall yesterday

The thing is with shops like this, it’s not just those choosing to enter the store (although why on earth would you?) who are affected by the stench. Just walking past the front door is bad enough. Of course, it’s worse in the enclosed area of a mall, but I can remember some genre of soap shop on Cornmarket Street in Oxford (it may well still be there), which polluted the entire left hand side of the street.
And it seems that even the experts agree:

Professor Mervyn Sprick from the University of Vange has called for ‘immediate emergency measures’ to be put in place at all shops selling three or more varieties of scented girly products.

He added: ‘This has been a tragedy waiting to happen for a number of years. I have walked past these shops before and people have been complaining of crippling headaches more than 500 yards away.
People don’t realise that although scented soaps are harmless when used individually, the combination of multiple fragrances can often be too much for a male to bear. It is a shame that on this occasion the cognitive overload has cost a young man his life.’

I couldn’t agree more. I now take the longer route around the block to get to the Mugg and Bean entrance of Cavendish Square instead of the direct route, simply to avoid the dangerous malodour wafting from the local branch of Lush.

If we were discussing airborne pathogens here, there would be strict rules and regulations in place. It amazes me that outlets like this continue to brazenly poison the public with noxious fumes with absolute impunity.

It’s only a matter of time until there are deaths in SA from this too.