Huntley never laid charges with cops

Oh dear. The Brandon Huntley case just gets worse and worse and worse for him, for Canada and for the hundreds of paranoid expats who have jumped on the negativity bandwagon, as the Mail & Guardian reports:

Brandon Huntley, the South African who was granted refugee status by Canada, never laid any charges with the police to back up his claims that he was attacked seven times in his home country.
He told immigration officials in Canada that black people had attacked him on seven different occasions and that white people were not safe in South Africa.

More evidence that this whole issue is a complete farce. 

“I’ve opened people’s eyes,” Huntley told the Star.

You certainly have, Brandon. To the fact that you are a ill-educated, unemployable, desperate, lying, racist cock.

White bloke moves to Canada: makes news

I really wasn’t going to follow this up, because it’s utterly stupid (if it’s even true), but I have had a lot of emails and this blog is yours*, so here goes.

This was on yesterday:

Ottawa – A white South African man has been granted refugee status in Canada, after an immigration board panel ruled he would be persecuted if he returned home to South Africa, the Ottawa Sun reports. This is the first time a white South African has been granted refugee status in Canada claiming persecution from black South Africans, the newspaper said.
Brandon Huntley, 31, presented “clear and convincing proof of the state’s inability or unwillingness to protect him”, the Canadian immigration and refugee board panel ruled last Thursday.
“I find that the claimant would stand out like a ‘sore thumb’ due to his colour in any part of the country,” tribunal panel chair William Davis said. 
Huntley’s “subjective fear of persecution remained constant and consistent” up to the time he made his refugee claim, Davis noted.
The Canadian newspaper reported that Huntley – who grew up in Mowbray, Cape Town – claimed he had been attacked seven times by black South Africans. He said he was called a “white dog” and a “settler”.
“There’s a hatred of what we did to them and it’s all about the colour of your skin,” Huntley reportedly said.
He first went to Canada on a six-month work permit in 2004, and returned in 2005. He stayed on illegally and made a refugee claim in April 2008, the Ottawa Sun reported.

And of course, the people who hate South Africa, many of whom have actually left and only get selective news snippets like this, have jumped on the bandwagon with glee. And they are shouting about the “white dog” and the “state’s inability or unwillingness to protect him” as if the Canadian immigration board panel is an expert on the situation in South Africa. Which they are obviously not.
If they were, then why would they make statements like “I find that the claimant would stand out like a ‘sore thumb’ due to his colour in any part of the country”, which is completely laughable, but will be conveniently ignored by the desperate and baying expat masses overseas because it doesn’t fit their agenda.

The whole thing is nonsense.

What about when Jeremy Clarkson went to Johannesburg and caused a sh!tstorm of note in SA by telling us that it was completely safe? The expats and their wannabe mates over here dived right in, screaming that “he didn’t go to [suburb]” and “he had an armed guard” etc etc, once again ignoring the rest of the column which detailed how lions in Kruger National Park were contracting HIV from the Mozambicans that they were eating. Now, despite my best efforts in searching, I didn’t see a single whining whitie complaint about that little gem, so I’m assuming that they fully agreed that it was true.
Which just shows you selective their vision is and how Looney Tunes their blinkered viewpoints are.

But back to the story at hand.
Brandon Huntley comes from a suburb about 5kms from where I live. It, much like South Africa, is a melting pot of many different colours and cultures. I would happily walk around there: it’s a safe, friendly and open place. In fact, the only minor issue is that it’s full of students. Maybe he was actually trying to get away from them (which I could completely understand), but then even Ottawa has a University, so that’s a non-starter, Brandon. Sorry.

At the end of the day, if Huntley had anything to offer Canada, he would have been welcomed with open arms. That he slipped in illegally through the back door means that SA is better off without him and his strangely paranoid views.
As for Canada; well, if you can just make stuff up about where you came from and they’ll believe it, then her doors are open. I would imagine that Brandon is already making plans to enjoy their extensive benefits system.

As I’ve said before… Good riddance.

* is it hell…

EDIT: Update here:

On Monday evening Russell Kaplan, Huntley’s legal representative, told Beeld that reports in South African newspapers concerning the problem of crime, among others, was used as proof.

I don’t know about you, but I believe absolutely EVERYTHING I read in the newspapers.
More selective vision, more cherry-picking the sensationalist stories and soundbites. The fact that the board believed it proves that the Canadian immigration procedures are an absolute joke.

EDIT 2: Another update here.

The Killers tickets “sold out”

Golden Circle tickets for The Killers’ Jo’burg concert at the Coca-Cola Dome on Friday 4th December have sold out – barely two hours after officially going on sale. Recession? What recession?
However, at the time of writing, Golden Circle tickets for the Cape Town concert on the 6th at the Val de Vie Polo Estate are still available.

There are many reasons why this dichotomy exists. Perhaps the greater numbers of tickets available for a larger venue, less demand, financial concerns or – most likely –  the fact that most Capetonians haven’t actually got around to heading onto the Computicket website, because it’s Friday, dude and the weekend actually started last night.
Jo’burgers will have been up at 3 to avoid the traffic and, having arrived at work at 7, will have proceeded to buy their tickets immediately before doing that filing, writing those reports and sms’ing each other about how great it was to have a thunderstorm last night and did you see the clouds that looked like a spaceship and there was lightning and how summer is almost here with it’s lovelyrain and hail.
These things make them happy, which is not great, because everyone knows that a happy Jo’burger is annoying.

You can tickets via Computicket for both concerts. I notice that Computicket have now officially labeled the Cape Town gig as “Paarl”, which is technically more accurate. The Killers’ official website is sticking with “Cape Town”, though. Probably because Americans don’t even know where South Africa is (there’s a hint in the name, guys), let alone Paarl.

I have mine. I know others who have theirs. You’d surely be silly to miss out.


There are some people in the world who think all Americans are stupid.

I disagree. Not all Americans are stupid. I’ve actually met a couple of rather intelligent Americans. 
But then, I guess calling someone stupid depends on your definition of stupid. And, in an effort to make all Americans look less stupid, the stupidity threshold has been raised quite significantly by Shane Bauer, Sara Shourd and Joshua Fattal. They are the three Americans who have been detained after they allegedly strayed into Iranian territory while hiking along the Iran/Iraq border.

Exactly how stupid do you have to be to get yourself into that situation? At what point did these three sit down together and collectively decide that this particular hike would be a “good thing to do”?

Hmm, the border between Iran and Iraq.
There’s a safe geographical location between two peaceful and stable nations whose people love America and where we will therefore obviously avoid any sort of incident or trouble.

I’m not an American taxpayer, but if I were, I would be writing to tell President Obama in no uncertain terms that I refuse to have a single cent of my money spent in funding any sort of negotiations or diplomatic efforts to get these idiots released from Iranian custody. Words cannot even begin to describe the awesome stupidity of their actions.
One almost hopes for the Iranians to enforce the death penalty, which would at least make the trio eligible for the Darwin Awards, so that something worthwhile can come out of this sorry affair.

Obviously, this story is still unfolding and I will almost certainly comment further on it once I am back from my bird-watching trip to Helmand Province in Afghanistan.

Apple’s dirty secret…

I love my iPod. Aside from my SEX1, it’s my favourite piece of kit and I use it every day.

Fortunately, it has never exploded, but if it did, I would never be able to tell you about it anyway. That’s because it has now emerged that Apple – wonderful, lovely, ethical, not-Microsoft Apple – are trying to hush people up when their iPods explode by forcing them to sign gagging orders if they want their money refunded. That’s nice. Friendly.

Apple attempted to silence a father and daughter with a gagging order after the child’s iPod music player exploded and the family sought a refund from the company.
The Times has learnt that the company would offer the family a full refund only if they were willing to sign a settlement form. The proposed agreement left them open to legal action if they ever disclosed the terms of the settlement.
The case echoes previous circumstances in which Apple attempted to hush up incidents when its devices overheated.

Which – to me, at least – doesn’t look like the most friendly or customer-orientated settlement offer for a defective product which could potentially have seriously injured its 11-year-old owner (yes, I know she looks older) because it exploded.


Much like the Trading Standards officials quoted in the article, I can completely understand why Apple want these incidents hushed up: Apple fans are generally hysterical, leftie drama-queens and wouldn’t want to risk damaging their freshly waxed legs by putting an iPod Touch in their Guess jeans’ pocket.

Fortunately for Steve Jobs, his brand remains safe. All he has to do is to add some feature onto an existing product – ideally a feature which should have been on the existing product in the first place (and maybe an extra letter onto the name) – and the blinkered Apple fanboys will go wild and bombard twitter with overly excited tweets that OMG! it’s going to be, like,  SO much better than their current Apple product and they CAN’T WAIT!!!!, helpfully forgetting that their current Apple product should really have done all that stuff already.
They’ll be so busy running off to the loo with pictures of the new over-priced phone/laptop/MP3 player that all the exploding iPod issues will be forgotten long before they go out and spend stupid amounts of money on the new device because it will impress their arty-farty friends; after all, it’s got that little logo on it and it may not explode.

Additionally, South African Apple fans will seek sympathy from similarly brain-washed individuals over the price of Apple products and how we only get the new stuff weeks after it is released in the US; crying about discrimination, while conveniently ignoring the fact that this happens here with every make, model and manufacturer of anything vaguely technological.

Yes folks, believe it or not (and some of you won’t) Apple is a big, ugly, capitalist company which is in business to make money. It doesn’t matter how trendy you think their products are or how cool it is to have the latest thing which looks exactly the same as the last thing does or did. There are very few people who find your chatter about memory size or connectivity exciting. They’re smiling and nodding just to be polite and because they’re waiting for the big bang when you play your next Jonas Brothers track.